FACING INFERTILITY

WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT

Facing Infertility

The journey of infertility can often be a time of overwhelming heartache, disappointment, and grief.

Whatever feelings you may be experiencing, you need to remind yourself of several important truths.

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One Couple’s Journey to Parenthood

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IT’S OK TO HOPE

Because of God’s goodness, you are never without hope. Psalm 113:9 says, “He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children.”

You can’t know exactly how God will choose to work in your life, but you can know He is able. He can restore fertility when it seems impossible. Or He may help you grieve your inability to have biological children and then cultivate in you a desire to adopt and love a child in desperate need of a Christian home. Your ability to hope in God begins by releasing everything to Him in prayer. In Philippians 4:6-7, Paul wrote:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

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IT’S OK TO GRIEVE

Hoping to offer comfort, some may downplay infertility and even point to the things you can enjoy as a couple without kids. If you already have at least one child, some people may not understand why you would be so sad about secondary infertility, ending your hopes for more children.

Whatever your circumstances, it’s common to experience a great sense of loss in finding out you can’t have a child. Jesus told his followers that those who mourn are blessed and will be comforted (Matthew 5:4).

A husband may not entirely understand what a wife facing infertility is going through, especially as her emotions are affected by changing hormones. This can be a vulnerable time for any couple. It’s important to share your thoughts and feelings openly, not stuffing them or letting your grief get lost in distractions and busyness.

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Going Further

When Empty Arms Become a Heavy Burden: Encouragement for Couples Facing Infertility  by Dr. Sandra Glahn

Focuses on emotional and spiritual struggles that accompany infertility as well as provides detailed information on associated medical issues and fertility treatments and alternatives.

In Due Time  by Caroline Harries

A 60-day daily devotional offering hope and encouragement for those struggling to conceive a child.

Barren Among the Fruitful: Navigating Infertility with Hope, Wisdom, and Patience  by Amanda Hope Haley

Surrounds those women struggling with infertility or miscarriage with a sense of community while providing honest facts and leads women from confusion to understanding.

IT’S ESSENTIAL TO BE IN COMMUNITY

It’s tempting to avoid talking about infertility and all the accompanying struggles.

Couples may want to pull away from other families, unsure what they’ll think or say. As hard as it may be, however, you still need Christian community – a safe place where you can “share your burdens with one another” (Galatians 6:2). It’s in community that you also can find encouragement from others who have been where you are. That’s the context of 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort who comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.”

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BE THE PARENT

Some parents interpret the need for relationship as a call to be good friends to their teens, but you need to be the parent – the one who brings stability and structure to the child’s life by setting boundaries and expectations.

Showing that kind of authority can be difficult for some, but it is an essential role of parenting. It can also be challenging to direct your teen in a way that doesn’t exasperate him or her (Ephesians 6:4) when you feel disrespected.

As the adult, you need to sacrifice your hurt feelings and anger to do what’s best for your teen. You are called as the parent to lovingly direct your teen through the challenges leading to adulthood. Ephesians 4:15 directs us to “speak the truth in love.”

Ask God to show you when it’s important to be tough and when you need to lead with gentleness and compassionate love.

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Living on the Edge exists to help Christians live like Christians. Established in 1995 as the radio ministry of pastor and author Chip Ingram, God has since grown it into an international discipleship ministry.

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